When you were pregnant, you likely abstained from alcohol. Now that your baby is born and you’re breastfeeding, you may wonder if you still need to refrain from drinking alcoholic beverages. Here’s the low-down on alcohol and breastfeeding.

Alcohol passes in and out of your breastmilk in the same way as it does in your bloodstream. So if you aren’t feeling the effects of the drink, then it’s likely that your baby would not be exposed to enough alcohol through breastmilk for it to be a concern.

According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, an occasional drink has not been found to be harmful to a breastfeeding baby. They suggest feeding your baby right before you enjoy a drink, then waiting two hours or more to minimize baby’s exposure. Even if you’re baby is hungry during that time, the dose of alcohol your baby would get is minimal (if you’ve had only one drink).

It takes about two to three hours for a 120-pound woman to eliminate one serving of beer or wine from her system. This rate changes depending on maternal weight, as well as whether or not you are eating or snacking while you’re enjoying your beverage.

The effects on your baby are directly proportional to effects on you. Babies may be sleepy and hard to rouse, though they get less sleep overall. Also, research shows that babies nurse more often but take in less milk generally. Experts think this may be due to inhibition of mom’s letdown reflex, which is a side effect of drinking alcohol, or with the fact that alcohol may change the way the breastmilk tastes or smells (and baby just doesn’t like the new flavor!).

Additionally, baby’s immature liver can’t metabolize alcohol at the same rate as an adult liver. Around three months of age, baby’s body can better handle this process. So limiting exposure during those first three months may lessen the effects alcohol could have on your baby.

There’s no need to ‘pump and dump’ after having a drink. Other methods to try to speed your sobriety – such as drinking a lot of water, “sleeping it off”, or drinking coffee – will not speed up this process, either.

Keep these tips in mind if you plan to combine an occasional drink with breastfeeding:

• Limit the frequency of consumption for the first three months of baby’s life.
• Consider low alcohol or non-alcoholic alternatives.
• Dilute your beverage with carbonated or flavored water and sip it slowly.
• Eat with your drink.
• Limit yourself to a single beer or glass of wine.
• Nurse your baby immediately before having a drink.
• Wait two to three hours after you’ve had a drink to nurse again.

Even though with these tips in mind an occasional drink may not harm your baby, ultimately it’s best not to drink alcohol or smoke at all while breastfeeding.

Written by Michelle, childbirth instructor, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

“If you pick your baby up every time he cries, you’re going to spoil him!”
“He’s just trying to manipulate you!”
“I see he’s already got you trained!”

How many of these have you heard? But science is on your side – you can’t hold your baby too much, and you’re not creating a whiny brat by picking him up. Instead, responsive parenting teaches your baby about trust and compassion.

Research shows that infant crying usually peaks around six weeks of age, and then decreases by half by 12 weeks of age. Did you know that if mom responds within 90 seconds of baby starting to cry, baby calms quickly? If she waits longer to respond, however, prolonged calming is needed. Who doesn’t want less crying? A quick response to a fussy baby makes a happier, less stressful environment for everyone.

Babies cry for all sorts of reasons, and you’ll be amazed by how quickly you learn to tell the ‘I’m hungry’ cry apart from the ‘I’m tired’ one. As your baby grows, you’ll learn all the other cues he uses to communicate with you. When you respond to those attempts at communication, your baby learns to trust you. You’re teaching your baby how to develop a secure attachment to you, the caregiver.

Studies from the 1950s to present day show that babies who are not responded to tend to grow up insecure, unsure, and more fearful. Babies who are responded to consistently and positively grow to be independent children and adults. In fact, as these babies grow, they …

• Have higher self-esteem
• Have improved focus, and fewer behavior problems
• Are better able to regulate their emotions
• Experience less fear and anxiety
• Are more likely show altruistic behaviors, such as, gratitude, appreciation, and caring

One of the most amazing benefits of responsive parenting and secure attachment is to baby’s brain. Babies experience incredible brain growth during the first two years of life when millions of connections are made between neurons. And the more connections, the better the brain functions. Studies show that parents can influence this growth by their interactions with baby. Being sensitive to baby’s cues, responding consistently, and interacting with baby will all add to baby’s intellectual development.

Holding, cuddling, touching and interacting all boost your baby’s nervous system development without being stressful. Oxytocin, the feel-good hormone of love, is released for both baby and caregiver during these interactions. A win-win for both parties!

So you won’t spoil your baby by picking him up all the time, especially in these first few months – in fact, you’ll do just the opposite.

Written by Michelle, childbirth educator, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

Welcome to parenting. Maybe you haven’t had a chance to enjoy it much yet – with all the feedings, diaper changes and sleep deprivation. You’re in a daily whirlwind of activity, and it all seems like a blur. It’s time for you to slow down and enjoy what’s special about your newborn baby.

That baby smell:

Year ago, I was at a breastfeeding conference with my then 3-week-old baby when a mom (who I was acquainted with but didn’t know well) asked if she could just smell my baby. Strangely, I didn’t find this at all weird, since I knew babies have a special smell about them. Researchers have found that sniffing a newborn baby’s head causes dopamine release in the reward pathways of the smeller’s brain.

While nobody knows what causes that newborn smell – just like other chemical messengers or pheromones, there’s likely a purpose. Researchers suggest that the unique smell helps moms recognize their own babies and fall in love with them.

The feel of baby sleeping on your chest:

Is it the warmth, the weight, the closeness, or maybe the absolute trust baby puts in us? Holding your sleeping baby curled up chest-to-chest with you is one of the most relaxing things you can do as a new mom. Even better if you’re skin-to-skin! Maybe this is only something you can truly appreciate when you look back on it while chasing after your now crawling baby.

Those tiny fingers and toes:

With our youngest baby, I remember saying to my husband, “Look at him – he’s four days old. He’ll never be just four days old again. Look now before it’s gone.” Take time to stroke baby’s hands and feet – touch is the most sensitive of the five senses, and both you and baby will benefit from these simple massages. It seems cliché to say time goes so fast, but it indeed does. Now I look at my 6-foot-tall oldest child and can barely remember him wrapping his tiny fingers around my thumb.

That amazingly soft skin:

The expression ‘soft as a baby’s bottom’ isn’t an exaggeration. Your baby may be born with a little bit of vernix still on his skin, which will rub off in the first few days. And you might notice hairs on the ears, back and shoulders – protective remnants from the uterine world. You and your baby may both enjoy infant massage. Use a light natural oil and gentle stroking.

Those incredible first smiles:

Sure some say they’re just gas, but what if they’re not? While child development experts say that true smiles don’t start until around 6 weeks, take pleasure in those occasional smirks you’re newborn bestows on you (even if he’s sleeping at the time!).

Parenting a newborn is sometimes thankless – after all, baby can’t tell you ‘I love you.’ But if you take a moment to enjoy the newness of the world to your little one and the amazingly complex creature your baby is, it may be all the thanks you need.

What’s your favorite things to enjoy about your newborn?

Written by Michelle, childbirth educator, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice.  All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

Maybe you are going out to dinner with your partner, or you’re returning to work soon. Maybe your baby has problems latching, or you need to supplement for health reasons. Whatever the reason, you find yourself unsure how to go about introducing a bottle to your breastfeeding baby.

What kind of bottle?

Anyone who has shopped for baby gear knows the crazy number of choices available for bottle feeding. Which bottle and nipple you use are up to you – and your baby. It sometimes takes trial and error before you find one your breastfed baby likes. On the other hand, some babies aren’t particular.

Try a slow-flow nipple – this will make your baby work a little harder to get the milk, making it more like breastfeeding. And try to match the nipple size and shape to your own anatomy, if possible.

How much milk?

Research shows that from one month to six months, breastfeeding babies’ intake is fairly stable at about 25 to 35 ounces (750-1050 ml) per day. In order to determine how much you need per bottle, take this average and divide it by the number of times your baby eats in 24 hours. If, for example, your baby nurses 10 times each day, that would be about 2.5 to 3.5 ounces (74-104 ml) per feeding. Your baby nurses 8 times per day? You’ll need more per bottle. Your baby nurses 12 times per day? He may take less but expect a bottle more often.

How do I do it?

Make bottle feeding as much like breastfeeding as you can. Follow your baby’s hunger cues rather than offering the bottle at a scheduled time. Cuddle baby, tickle his lips with the teat, and let him draw the nipple into his mouth. Hold the bottle more horizontal so that baby can control the flow a little better, and give him pauses just like he normally does at the breast. You might even consider switching sides halfway through the bottle feeding.

Your baby may be more likely to accept the bottle if someone other than mom provides it. Mom may need to leave the room or even the house!

What if my baby resists?

If your baby resists the bottle:

• Warm or cool the nipple under running water before offering it to baby.
• Try warmed, room temperature or even cold milk. Some babies enjoy milk slushies.
• Try a different nipple.
• Express some of the milk onto the bottle nipple.
• Feed on the go – stand, walk, or move.
• Stay away from his preferred nursing chair.
• Try holding baby facing away from you, or other positions to make bottle feeding less like breastfeeding.
• Hold a blanket or t-shirt that smells like mom when feeding baby.
• Consider using a cup or medicine spoon rather than a bottle – just keep in mind it will be messier and more time consuming.

Be patient. Continue to offer the bottle occasionally and your baby may gradually become accustomed to it. Even if you’re in more of a hurry (with that back-to-work deadline looming perhaps), try not to make it a battle. Eventually your baby will figure it out.

Are you giving your baby both breast and bottle? What tips do you have for other moms?

Written by Michelle, Lamaze instructor, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice.  All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

Nothing is more difficult than a fussy baby. I had three very placid, easygoing babies, and then my fourth was a real game-changer. He cried every night for weeks. It was difficult on me AND on the rest of the family.

If you’ve got a fussy baby, you know the challenge. You’ve changed your baby’s diaper, fed her, burped her, and checked that none of her clothing was scratching her; but, she’s still fussy. How can you figure out what could possibly be wrong, and what can you do to make her more comfortable?

Some babies simply have a daily fussy period. And some babies are easier to console than others. If you’ve ruled out illness and other physical causes, there simply may not be a reason other than baby needs extra care and attention.

Women’s wisdom over the ages tells us that these strategies work like a charm – passed from generation to generation as mothering wisdom. How many of us instantly start saying ‘sh-sh-sh-sh’ to a crying baby while gently swaying from side to side? Here are other methods of calming fussiness that you may not have tried:

White noise: the ‘sh-sh-sh-sh’ noise we naturally make to calm a baby mimics the sound of mom’s blood flow, something familiar to baby from in utero. Other ways to create white noise include tuning a radio to static, running the vacuum cleaner, taking a shower. Or set your baby in a seat on the floor next to your clothes dryer. Any soothing wave-like sound is helpful – a fan in the bedroom or even a white noise machine. You can also try the White Noise section in the Baby + App. There are many different White Noise sounds for you to try in the App.

Movement: put your baby in a sling or wrap and go about your day. If you have an infant swing or bouncer chair, give that a try. Motion is calming (think of how your baby moved with you before birth).

Breastfeeding: If you’re a nursing mom, allow your baby to nurse as much as necessary during those fussy times. If your baby isn’t interested in feeding, try a pacifier or your clean knuckle to suck on.

Position changes: Side-lying positions seem to calm a fussy baby, especially when they’re done in arms. Consider this hold: Place your baby on one forearm with legs straddling your wrist and head resting near your elbow. Use your hands to support baby’s body fully, and pull baby in close to you. Light pressure on baby’s tummy is sometimes helpful during fussy times, too. Your hands will be in that position in the hold described above. Or carry your baby much higher up on your shoulder so your bone puts a little pressure on baby’s tummy. Always place your baby on her back for sleep, though.

Hold tight: Imagine your baby before birth, tightly cuddled and warm in your belly. Your baby may be calmer if you re-create this environment. You might use swaddling, or you might decide that carrying your baby in a sling or wrap is easier.

If your baby cries for more than 3 hours each day for 3 days in a week lasting for 3 weeks or more, your baby may have colic. While colic has no known cause or cure, comfort measures are the same as for normal everyday fussiness. Babies may just never fully settle, and parents may just need more of a break. Most babies outgrow colic by 3-4 months.

If you ever find yourself becoming panicked or angry about your baby’s crying, be sure to lay your baby somewhere safe (in a crib, preferably), and give yourself a ‘time out.’ Leave the room, call a friend, or, leave the house altogether (as long as someone else is around to care for baby). A quick walk around the neighborhood may be enough to restore your equilibrium.

Babies fuss for many reasons – after all, crying is how they communicate. Learning what works best for your baby is one of the challenges of parenthood. You are the expert on your baby. If you suspect something is wrong, seek medical care. Otherwise, keep trying until you find what methods work best for your family.

Written by Michelle, childbirth educator, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice.  All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

For whatever reason, you’ve decided to pump your breastmilk and provide this to your baby by bottle. But what can you do to ensure you’re on the right path to provide the most milk for your baby?

1. Choose your pump wisely: When you’re pumping to provide all of your baby’s nutrition, you need something efficient. The most expensive pump on the market may not be the best choice. And not all electric pumps are created equal. So, do your research before buying or renting a pump to be sure it’s the best one for your individual needs.

2. Get to know your pump: Learn not only how to operate all of the pump’s settings, but also how your body reacts to pumping. Do you need to change the settings to take full advantage of your let-downs? Do you need to turn the pump off and massage your breasts? Don’t be afraid to make adjustments to your routine or to reassess the pump’s settings as time goes by.

3. Learn to let down: The biggest problem for many moms is relaxing enough for milk ejection. If you’re multitasking while pumping or impatiently watching the bottles willing them to fill faster, you may negatively impact your let-down. Consider putting on a sweater, making sure the room you’re in is warm enough, or placing a warm compress on your breasts before pumping. Try hands-on techniques like breast massage to maximize the amount you’re able to pump. Think about each of your senses and how you might use them to facilitate pumping (for example, hearing your baby cry or coo may trigger your hormones and your let-down).

4. Know how to maintain your supply: The amount of milk you can get each pumping session (and how often you need to pump to maintain the same output) will vary from woman to woman. Some research suggests that a total of 120 to 140 minutes of pumping each day is typical for exclusively pumping moms to maintain their supplies. How long you can go between pumping sessions, and how long each session should be, is trial and error.

5. If your output decreases, change things up: Experts say adding a few short pumping sessions may be more effective than adding minutes to your current pumping sessions. Check all of your pump parts – they do wear out occasionally. If you’re using a double electric pump, try pumping only one side, switching to a hand pump, or even manually expressing milk. Or change the time of day you pump. Anything to get out of the rut will help.

6. Find support: Common concerns for pumping moms include milk supply issues, plugged ducts, mastitis and sore nipples, to name just a few. Find professionals who are supportive of your feeding choice. And find other exclusively pumping moms – they will be the best source of ideas and encouragement.

While people may wonder why in the world you have chosen this path, others will understand that each woman does the best she can to give her baby a great start in life. Congratulations on giving your baby the many benefits breastmilk has to offer.

Are you pumping milk for your baby? What tips do you have?

Written by Michelle, Lamaze instructor, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

Breastmilk production is designed to work in perfect concert with your baby’s needs. If you are feeding your baby ‘on cue,’ or whenever he shows signs of hunger rather than based on a predetermined schedule, your body will make just the right amount of milk to satisfy him.

One of the most common reasons for supplementation and weaning, however, is thinking that you don’t have enough milk. Whether you simply perceive your supply to be low or your body is truly not making enough milk, what can be done?

Galactagogues – substances that are thought to increase milk supply – are often recommended for moms with supply issues. There are different categories of galactagogues – and many choices in each category depending on your individual needs.

Milk-Making Foods

You’ve probably seen recipes for lactation cookies or smoothies that take advantage of the lactogenic properties of particular foods. Lactogenic foods are typically easy to add to your diet, and don’t have many side effects. So they are a good first try to help increase your supply. Consider adding oats, quinoa, hops, brewer’s yeast, almonds, garlic, and sesame seeds to your regular meals. Remember, though, there’s no ‘dose’ for these foods – what works for one mom may not work for another.

Herbs

Fenugreek is the most common herb used for increasing milk supply, and it’s sometimes paired with blessed thistle. But other herbs may be better for your particular situation. Other common herbal galactagogues include marshmallow root, goat’s rue, alfalfa, fennel, raspberry leaf, moringa / malunggay, and shatavari. Do you research and be sure you are taking the right amount to make a difference. Herbs, like medications, do have side effects and precautions, so work with an herbalist or naturopath to be sure you’re using the herbs safely.

Prescription medications

Metoclopramide (Reglan) and domperidone (Motilium) are the two medications most often prescribed for milk supply problems. You’ll need to work closely with your doctor, your baby’s doctor, and a lactation consultant if you are using one of these options. But for some moms, medications make a huge difference in milk production.

How to decide what’s right for you

No galactagogue will work if milk isn’t being removed from the breast often. Milk removal is the key to milk production. When milk isn’t removed often enough, your body sends out chemical signals to slow production. But when the breast is emptied and refilled regularly, production increases. Nursing your baby more often, or adding pumping to your daily routine, may be necessary along with the galactagogues. A visit with a lactation consultant may be warranted – he or she can help you decide if your supply is really low, if your baby is able to transfer milk, and how to go about improving your breastfeeding experience.

Have you purposely added any lactogenic foods to your breastfeeding diet?

Written by Michelle, Lamaze instructor, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

You wait 9 long months. You write a birth plan and attend childbirth classes. You practice relaxation exercises and get your birth partner on board. Then birth happens. Maybe you have a long labor – or even a very short one. Maybe it was more difficult than you imagined, or you felt violated in some way by the healthcare system or providers. Maybe you needed an unplanned cesarean surgery. Maybe baby or you were in need of advanced medical care afterwards.

Whatever the situation, you look down at the baby in your arms and wonder why you feel so bad about your birth experience.

Birth is an amazing, transformative experience. Birth changes you from a woman to a mother. And it profoundly affects how you feel about your own mind and body – was it an empowering experience or was it disabling? Did it leave you feeling like you can conquer the world, or like you want to crawl into a cave to hide? How we perceive our births changes how we feel about ourselves and our babies.

Postpartum hormones may be partially to blame for your weepiness or feelings of sadness or inadequacy in the days after birth. But your lived experience is also in play. Renowned pediatrician, William Sears, writes, “It’s okay to be happy about your healthy baby but sad about your birth. Unresolved birth memories have a way of gnawing at your insides, affecting your sense of who you are.” Dealing with those feelings is an important step in moving forward as a mom.

Emotions are subjective – there’s no right or wrong way to feel about your birth. There’s only the reality of how it feels for you. Once you accept that, you can work to heal. If you’re having trouble getting past your birth experience, try one or more of the following:

Forgive yourself: Labor and birth are unpredictable. While you can plan for what you might do in certain situation, you cannot control every aspect. Don’t blame yourself for things that did not go as planned. Let go of all the “If only I had …” thoughts.

Get the details: Ask your partner, doula or healthcare provider to tell you about your birth with just the facts. Or obtain your medical records. Don’t judge any of the details, just record them as you’re told. Consider what you remember and write that down. Once you have a detailed chronology of how your birth unfolded, you can better explore where your feelings of anger, resentment or inadequacy come from.

Grieve the loss: You may wonder why you would grieve if you’ve got a beautiful baby at home. But the feelings of loss may be the same – you are grieving the loss of the woman you imagined yourself to be. And while that self-image doesn’t define who you are, it can impact how you interact with others, including your baby. Stages of grief include denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. You may go through only some of these stages, or you may experience them all. They are not likely to come in any certain order. Every woman’s grieving experience is different – there are no set rules.

Talk it out: Whether you attend a local support group or find an online forum, you will learn that many women have a less-than-desired birth. Just talking about your birth with others who can empathize helps you to work through your feelings about the experience. Or you might feel more comfortable talking to people you feel closest to: your partner, your own mother, or a close friend. If you cannot get past your feelings of loss or grief, professional counseling may be useful.

Change your story: Start by putting your story down on paper. Write it all out – the good, the bad and the ugly. Don’t censor yourself. Think about how you feel in the retelling, but don’t let that change what you’re writing. Notice what parts make you feel judgmental of yourself, and which parts make you happy, relieved or grateful. Then set it aside for a few days. Now go back and reread. What parts still bother you, and what parts have you forgiven? Think about how you might choose different words to describe your experience, and whether that changes how you feel about the event. Or take the parts about which you still feel negative and brainstorm what you have learned from them.

Tincture of time: As time passes, and as your mothering experience grows and expands with your baby, the details of your birth will lose their rough edges. You may still look back on them with regret, but the sensations won’t necessarily be so visceral. Keep in mind post-traumatic stress disorder may be a consequence of a bad birth experience. Dealing with your feelings – whether on your own or with professional help – is important so that the memories triggered with a future pregnancy or birth don’t lead to complications.

If healing is taking longer than expected or if you think you have symptoms of postpartum depression, consider professional support. (For more information about postpartum mood disorders, visit Postpartum Support International).

Written by Michelle, Lamaze instructor, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice.  All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

When you imagine life with a new baby, do you picture a softened image with mom sitting in a rocking chair next to a sunlit window covered with gauzy curtains with a sleeping baby in her arms and an angelic smile on her face? While having a new baby is a wonderful life event, the nitty-gritty, day-to-day details are maybe not so glamorous.

Babies change everything. While your pre-baby life may have been organized and routine, your life now is anything but that. It’s 4pm and you’re still in your pajamas and haven’t yet brushed your teeth. You’re hungry but have no idea what you’ll fix for dinner, or if you even have the energy to cook. You want to go to sleep but know baby will wake any minute. Instead of resting, you’ve used this naptime to catch up on returning emails. What now?

You may need to make some adjustments to help you cope. Here’s what you can do to survive the early days with your newborn:

• Sleep when baby sleeps: don’t use naptime to catch up on chores, sleep instead. If you can’t sleep, at least rest. Dim the lights, turn on quiet music, and close your eyes.
• Limit visitors in the early weeks: everyone wants to see a new baby, but playing hostess can be tiring. If you do have guests, stay in your pajamas as a cue that they’re not to stay long. Consider asking friends and family to pitch in with the work you can’t get done – ask them to tidy up the dishes in the sink or put in a load of laundry.
• Eat well and stay hydrated: keep a drink at hand, as well as lots of healthy snacks you can eat with one hand (while holding baby in the other!)
• Get some exercise and fresh air: even if you simply stand on your back porch for 10 minutes, the fresh air will do you good. If you’re up for it, take a short walk around your neighborhood with baby in a sling or stroller. Baby may sleep longer, and it may be easier for you to rest afterwards.
• Be gentle on yourself: let go of rules and expectations about life with baby. You’re just learning – even if you have older children, this baby has a completely new personality you need to learn.
• Remember your relaxation exercises: if you took a childbirth class and learned breathing exercises or other forms of relaxation, practice them now, too.
• Communicate with your partner: don’t let small resentments flourish. Instead talk about anything that’s bothering you.
• Find peer support: find a mom and a baby playgroup, a breastfeeding support group, or just go to the park or library children’s department and make the effort to talk to other moms.
• Get help: whether you need help with housekeeping, baby care, depression, or breastfeeding, find the right support person. Your childbirth educator, lactation consultant, midwife or obstetrician are all good sources of information for what’s available in your community.

Most of all trust yourself and enjoy your baby! You don’t have to get everything ‘right’ – parenting isn’t a test. Pretty soon things will start to settle into a more predictable routine, and those early days and weeks will be a blur you look back on with fondness.

Written by Michelle, childbirth instructor, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice.  All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

The first few months after birth can be considered a 4^th trimester for you and your baby. As he adjusts to the outside world, your baby still expects many of the same comforts of the womb he had in the 3^rd trimester. Frequent feeding is just one of those. Being held all the time is another.

Parents sometimes find their newborn babies stay calmer and fuss less when swaddled much of the time, since swaddling mimics being held tight in the womb. While being held in the arms of a caregiver is preferred, swaddling can allow you some time with your hands free!

Here are some tips and tricks to make swaddling work for you:

• Use a light blanket for swaddling – dress baby lightly underneath the swaddling blanket, keep the room temperature comfortable, and watch for signs of overheating, such as warm/hot skin, flushed cheeks, heat rashes or rapid breathing.
• Consider baby’s hands – Some babies like to have their hands near their faces when swaddled, rather than having them trapped in the tight blanket. Try both ways to see what works for you.
• Keep hip health in mind – hip dysplasia has been linked to too-tight swaddling. Keep baby’s legs in a “frog” position – with the legs bent and out at the hips – or allow them to be loose so baby can find a naturally comfortable position.
• Keep the blanket from touching baby’s cheek or mouth – this could prompt the rooting reflex which may be counterproductive to calming.
• Always place your baby on his back to sleep, even when he is swaddled.
• Avoid a too-tight blanket – you should be able to get a couple of fingers between the blanket and the baby.
• Avoid a too-loose blanket – the blanket itself can pose a suffocation risk if baby can wriggle free.
• Watch for hunger cues – swaddled babies may sleep longer and deeper, but this may be detrimental to your milk supply and baby’s growth. A swaddled baby may need to be awakened to eat.
• Swaddle selectively – use it as a calming tool, but let baby move his arms and legs when he’s awake and alert.
• Don’t swaddle forever – Once your baby can roll over on his own (typically between 4 and 6 months), it’s best to stop swaddling.  If he’s swaddled he may have difficulties breathing, when he rolls over onto his tummy.

An option to swaddling your baby is to wear your baby in a carrier, such as a sling or wrap. This allows baby to be in a womb-like cocoon while at the same time feeling your movements and your warmth, and hearing your heartbeat and your voice – all of which is calming to a newborn.

Whether you choose swaddling or babywearing, remember that one comforting method won’t work all the time. As you get to know your baby, you’ll learn what works best for him and for you.

Have you been swaddling your baby? What tips do you have for new moms?

Written by Michelle, Lamaze instructor, lactation consultant, and mother to 4 busy kids

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice.  All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

If anything is certain, it’s that life will never be the same once your baby arrives. All of a sudden, you’ll have this whole other person who depends on you, and who loves you unconditionally. Being a parent changes so much, and makes you feel emotions you didn’t know existed before. But, that’s not to say it’s all rose-tinted and easy. Far from it, in fact, life with a newborn baby can be really tough, and it’s always best to be prepared.

What is sleep?
You might think, at nine months pregnant, that you are the most tired you will ever be. The huge bump, the heat, the constant need to wee, and the backache are probably stopping you getting a good night’s sleep. Add to this the worries about impending parenthood, and it’s not wonder you’re exhausted. The tiredness of a new parent is so much more than that though. Newborn babies are pretty much nocturnal, so you’ll be spending a lot of restless nights looking after your new baby. Don’t worry though, you will cope. Just remember, it won’t last forever. Sleep when your baby sleeps, and don’t over do it. If you’re too tired for guests, say so. It’s more important that you feel well rested and able to care for your baby.

The crying
The sound of your newborn baby crying will be one of the most awful sounds you’ll ever hear. It will send you into panic mode, your breasts will start leaking and you will become focused on how to stop the cries. Sometimes a simple cuddle or a quick feed will suffice, but other times it may feel like there is nothing you can do to stop the crying. Cuddle, rock, feed, sing, walk or drive around – try anything you can to soothe your newborn child.

Breastfeeding woes
Breastfeeding, while natural and wonderful, can also be sore at the beginning. This takes many new mums by surprise, and can leave them feeling upset and like a failure. Rest assured, you’re not a failure. Most new mums struggle with breastfeeding. If you’re finding it painful, or are struggling to get the correct latch, or simply feel worried about breastfeeding, speak to a professional for help. There are so many trained volunteers and specialists ready and waiting to help you with any breastfeeding problems.

Goodbye me time
For the first few weeks at least, you will struggle to get some time to yourself. You will have unruly eyebrows, unpolished nails and you’ll have no idea what’s been happening on your favourite TV show. Don’t worry though, you will eventually regain some of your me time. In the meantime, ask your partner to help out by looking after the baby while you take an hour or so to relax. Have a bath, read a book and just generally enjoy using your arms again.

Slow and steady
Everything takes a lot longer when you have a newborn to look after. Simple tasks like cooking dinner, cleaning the house and sorting out the clean laundry, can take seemingly endless amounts of time. You will struggle to get things done with a newborn. It’s worth preparing for this in advance. Stockpile your freezer full of pre-cooked meals that you can heat up in a hurry. Try to have the house organised before the baby arrives, hopefully your nesting instinct will help you out there, so that you don’t have lots of tidying to do before your guests arrive. Guests won’t mind a messy house, they’ll be distracted by the beautiful newborn anyway so don’t waste time tidying when you could be snuggling your new baby.

Help me
If you need help with the house, or you need someone to look after your baby for an hour while you have a shower, just ask. Your friends and family will be only too happy to help out in return for a couple of cuddles (from the baby, not you). Try to make it to mother and baby groups, so you can socialise with other new mums who know exactly what you’re going through. It’s important to have a support system on hand in those early months.

Do you have any advice to add, to help soon-to-be-mums prepare for life with a newborn?

Written by Fiona, proud owner of a toddler, @fiona_peacock

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2015. All rights reserved.