The Importance of Consistency

Babies and young children thrive when they are in routines and know what to expect. It doesn’t have to be a strict routine with scheduled nap times and snack breaks but a simple pattern to each day will help your child to relax. It may seem a little too early to be talking about the importance of consistency, but even babies can benefit from knowing what to expect. Here are a few things to consider about the importance of consistency:

  1. Boundaries

Setting consistent, firm and clear boundaries is one of your most important jobs as a mom. Boundaries help your child to stay safe and behave appropriately. They also help her to feel safe. A child without clear boundaries may feel stressed because they simply do not understand what is expected of them. You don’t have to shout or use threats to set boundaries. A simple explanation as to why something is not allowed will suffice. Be consistent with your boundaries. If your baby isn’t allowed to crawl over to the fire, make sure you are always consistent with this message, even when the fire isn’t on.

  1. Discipline

However you choose to discipline your child, it’s important that you are consistent. If you react calmly one minute and then lose your head the next, this can be very scary for young children. Remember, you don’t need over the top reactions to get your child to listen, in fact sometimes, a gentler approach can be the most successful.

  1. Routine

As mentioned above, children thrive thanks to a routine. Make sure you eat lunch at around a similar time each day and try to encourage a routine bedtime. This allows your child to anticipate what will happen next and can lead to your child feeling less anxious throughout the day.

  1. Flexibility

Routines don’t have to be rigid. Just because your baby is usually in bed by 7pm, it doesn’t mean she has to miss out on bonfire night. It’s ok to bend the rules occasionally. You can explain to your baby why things are a little different today. Babies benefit from new experiences so flexibility is important.

  1. Caregivers

Your baby doesn’t need all of her caregivers to be identical, but she would benefit from some consistency. If you take a gentle approach to parenting, it makes sense to choose a childcare provider who follows the same basic principles. Of course, you and your partner won’t parent identically, but if you agree on the basics, then that’s important because it will allow your child to have consistent care.

Written by Fiona (@Fiona_Peacock), mother, writer and lover of all things baby related.

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general information basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright © Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.

Disciplining Without Spanking

Right now, your child is at an age where they are struggling to communicate their wants and needs, often coming up short and feeling frustrated when you don’t automatically understand what they’re trying to tell you.

That frustration can quickly morph into tantrums that will become a big part of your next few years. The terrible twos can start early, and your little one may already be hitting, kicking, biting, and screaming anytime he or she is upset.

They are lashing out because they are frustrated, but the result is that you are often left plenty frustrated as well.

Still, what exactly are you supposed to do? How do you best discipline a child who isn’t yet at an age where they fully understand what you are trying to communicate to them?

Some may argue for spanking. But doesn’t it seem a little backwards to try to address aggressive behavior with an aggressive response?

There is plenty of research to back up the fact that spanking is not the best disciplinary tactic. But what will work for a child who isn’t even one yet?

First and foremost, staying calm and separating yourself from the situation can sometimes be your greatest tool. This isn’t always possible—when a tantrum happens in the middle of a grocery aisle, you can’t just walk away. But when it takes place at home, giving some space and allowing your child to tantrum without you trying to calm them, can send the message that throwing those fits isn’t going to get the reaction they are hoping for. It can also allow you to separate yourself and calm down too, rather than engaging in a battle of wills with a frustrated child. Keep your child in sight so you can monitor the situation and ensure their safety.

Timeouts may also be a way to go, though at this age, you can’t expect your little one to just sit in a corner by themselves. Instead, choose a time out location, and sit with them. Place your child in your lap, facing away from you, and wrap your arms around him or her so that they can’t lash out and hit during the timeout. Let your child know that when they calm down, the timeout can be over.

Realistically, at this age, discipline is tough. What works for one child may not work for another, and you might have to experiment to find out what kind of consequences get through to your child the best. While doing that, though, try to remember that your little one is working through a normal stage and shouldn’t be punished too harshly for typical behavior—taking away a favorite toy for a week most likely won’t send the message you are hoping for.

Consistency, calm reactions, and compassionate discipline will often get you much further at this age than authoritarian measures. You may also find your child responds far better to positive reinforcement than negative punishments for now.

Your methods will change as the months and years go by, but at this age, it’s just about finding what works for your child, and what feels right for your home. When in doubt, don’t hesitate to talk to your pediatrician about ideas that might be a good fit for you and your little one.

Written by Leah Campbell, infertility advocate, adoptive mama, writer and editor. Find me @sifinalaska on Twitter.

This information is not intended to replace the advice of a trained medical doctor. Health & Parenting Ltd disclaims any liability for the decisions you make based on this information, which is provided to you on a general informational basis only and not as a substitute for personalized medical advice. All contents copyright Health & Parenting Ltd 2016. All rights reserved.